have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Randomize
