Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
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