My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Randomize