Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
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