I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
