maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
Randomize
