It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize
