and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
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I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
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He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
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