if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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