No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Randomize
