Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Randomize
