ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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