Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize