honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
