He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
So vagazzling was a success
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
Randomize
