So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
