Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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