so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
