I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Randomize
