Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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