Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Randomize
