what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
