That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
It was confusing and full of hummus
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
