Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize
