My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Randomize
