what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
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