Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
