I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
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