He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Randomize
