me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
where does the pee come out of this thing
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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