i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Randomize
