I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
