We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize