I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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