i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
Randomize
