is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
