Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Randomize
