? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Randomize
