? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize
