So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
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