SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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