New invention idea: vibrating tampons
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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