i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Randomize
