So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
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