what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
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