I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
do herpes really smell.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize
