Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Randomize
