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• (862): View more from New Jersey

  i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life

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• (217): View more from Illinois

  he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.

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• (435): View more from Utah

  He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.

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  23 Parents Gave Awful Advice about “The Birds and the Bees”

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (406): View more from Montana

  You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B

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• (646): View more from New York

  still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious

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• (312): View more from Illinois

  Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend

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• (972): View more from Texas

  The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard

  (972): View more from Texas

  OHHH and there was a Batman too.

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  These 19 Deaths Are Ironically Hilarious

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• (432): View more from Texas

  3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.

  (1-432): View more from Texas

  Erry day erry day!

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• (302): View more from Delaware

  This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.

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• (612): View more from Minnesota

  We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...

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• (314): View more from Missouri

  I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.

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• (406): View more from Montana

  I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form

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• (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.

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