i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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