I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
Someone signed my nipple.
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